July 29, 2011

My fork is forkier than your fork.

THE CJ CURRY EXPERIENCE: EPISODE 100 + 2
"EAT THIS, FOLKS"

You came back. That was a bad choice.

I have some statistics here that may amuse you. They are all about my life. Numbers amuse me. Numbers are my friend. Numbers rule the world because they just work and they tell people how the world works despite the fact most people think that they're arbitrary but the point is they work EVERY TIME and holy shit I need to start giving you some actual numbers.
  • height: 6'3"
  • weight: 71kg
  • BMI: ridiculously low
  • toes: 10
  • fingers: 8
  • thumbs: 2
  • batteries: 2xAA
  • age: 0L
  • cards: 54
  • cards needed: 64
  • cheap wine: not enough
  • last poker hand dealt: straight (without a flush)
  • level on Borderlands: 14
  • missions on Starcraft II: 24/25
  • songs in iTunes library: 8,560
  • your love: not enough
Next, I have a various assortment of factoids about me:
  • I eat twenty packets of Mi Goreng every hour
  • I own a wombat, whose name is Nivram
  • I know world leaders on a first-name basis
  • I hold the world record for "most pointless world records"
  • I destroyed the Xel'naga race with my bare hands
  • I own 10 computers
  • I need a massage
Eagle-eyed readers will notice that I have lied on exactly two of those factoids. The other five factoids are true factoids. Which factoids are the true factoids, and which ones are the false factoids? Comment below. Please. Otherwise kittens will die.

Finally, here is a pseudo-random assortment of cards.
  • 7♥
  • 8♠
  • K♣
  • Q♦
  • 7♠
No wonder I never play poker.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

First and fourth factoids are incorrect

CJ Curry said...

Sorry it took me this long to reply, but you're dead right.

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