Don't talk, or I'll lose my balance!

the 89th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E09: A JOKE'S A JOKE, BUT THIS HAS GONE SOME WAY BEYOND THE REALMS OF LIGHT ENTERTAINMENT!

Welcome to CJ Curry's 20 Questions! Have you been paying attention to the 88 preceding blogs?

QUESTIONS

1. What is CJ Curry's name?
2. When is it Experience Time?
3. Name CJ Curry's favourite TV show's best line's best word's best letter.
4. Black or white?
5. Apple or orange?
6. Apple or Microsoft?
7. How soon is now?
8. What time is love?
9. Zap zap?
10. What colour is the bin outside of my window?
11. Why did I spell "colour" with a 'u'?
12. Why did I use single quotes around the letter 'u', but double quotes around the word "colour"?
13. Why did I do it again?
14. Do I have an itch?
15. Call me a vegetable.
16. What is my pet ghost's name?
17. Who wrote "teal deer" as a comment on one of my posts?
18. I'm going geocaching. Where?
19. My packet of cards has how many diamonds?
20. You're driving a bus from Melbourne to Adelaide. In Melbourne, you start out with 36 passengers. You pick up 5 from Ballarat, drop 7 off at Horsham, pick 4 more up at Nhill, drop off 8 at Bordertown, then you arrive in Adelaide without any other stoppages. The question is: What is CJ Curry's name?

Answers:

1. Aloysius Snottenheimer.
2. Any time it's not Game Time, it's Experience Time.
3. X. (I will also accept Z.)
4. Pink with purple polka dots. Of course.
5. Apple.
6. Neither. If Windoze lackeys are Bill Gates' devil spawn, then I am the lovechild of Linus Torvalds and Richard Stallman.
7. Soon enough. Which, of course, isn't soon enough.
8. Wednesday night.
9. Kaboom!
10. Colourful.
11. I'm not an American. I therefore don't corrupt English.
12. I'm a computer scientist who has made Java my bitch and I therefore like chars in single quotes.
13. Because I'm fucking anally-retentive.
14. No!
15. OK, you're a celery.
16. Fred.
17. Someone going under the name of "Anonymous". Damn you, legion.
18. Anywhere my shoes take me.
19. 197. Not including patterns on the back.
20. Aloysius Snottenheimer. Duh.

So, how did you go? Tally up your correct answers, multiply this number by 5, stand on your head, jump on the back of a yak (still upside-down), read the Bible from the middle to the outsides, and see how well you scored:

• 0-5: A Very Non-Spicy Curry
  Curry-boy is disappointed with you.
  
• 5-32: A Slightly Spicier Curry
  You're not good enough to be considered an Elite Curry yet.
• 32-41.5: A Mildly Hot Curry
  How did you get this many right?
• 41.5-74: A Hotly Mild Curry
  Well done. You spotted the trick question.
• 74-99: A Decently Warm Curry
  You're not good enough to be considered an Elite Curry yet, either.
• 99-99.5: A Super Hot Curry
  Yowch. Congratulations for getting this far.
• 99.5-99.9: An Ultra Hot Curry
  Yowch. This curry is hot.
• 99.9-99.95: A Mega Hot Curry
  I think I'm burning my tongue...
• 99.95-99.999997: An Amazingly "Hot And Burning, I Mean, So Hot It Burns Your Bloody Mouth Off, That's How Amazingly Hot This Thing Is" Curry
  You're not good enough to be considered an Elite Curry yet, either. But you're not far off.
• 99.999997-99.999998: An Elite Curry
  You're good enough to be considered an Elite Curry. Congratulations. Application forms can be picked up in the lobby of the Curry Building, in my Minecraft file.
• 99.999998-100: A Totally Bullshitting Curry
  You didn't score 100. No way in hell.

By the way, you are also eligible for the Elite Curry brigade if your score was exactly a multiple of π. You are eligible to become an officer if that multiple was a prime number. You are eligible for the new position of CJ Curry if that prime number was also a Mersenne Prime. And trust me, I have a very good bullshit filter, so I can pick out people who are lying. Have fun.

join the experience again soon...