May 14, 2011

Who are your main tenants?

the 95th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E15: JUST BECAUSE I EAT FOOD, DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN DISCRIMINATE AGAINST ME!

It'd be just my luck, wouldn't it? I finally (after ten days) get around to writing another Experience and Blogger is down for maintenance. Means I also couldn't update this for a while. I was not a happy chappy yesterday. Now I'm a sick happy chappy. But on with the blog. Your mindless bullshit is all the same to me anyway.

I've written a lot of things you're currently wishing you hadn't read. But that was your fault and yours alone. UNTIL NOW! The CJ Curry Experience now comes with a free, once-in-a-lifetime offer that is free and guaranteed to be your favourite free thing in all of freedom. It's a MINDFUCK WARRANTY! I'm providing free mindfuck warranties: that is, I'll fully reimburse you for any mindfuck you have while you read this (normal value $4,993.52). This offer of a free mindfuck warranty will last until the end of this paragraph.

Owls. Everyone is fond of owls.
Cheds. Everyone is fond of Cheds.
Portal 2. Everyone is fond of Portal 2.
Politicians. Everyone is fond of hating politicians.

I have my reasons for wanting to stay invisible. Please respect these wishes. Because I'm kickass, but not *that* kickass. Yet. And I don't like being visible during these times. I'm sure you'll understand. ...wait, what? I'm not invisible? Damn. Oh well, OK then, I'm only partially, temporarily and sporadically pseudo-invisible. BUT I STILL HAVE RIGHTS.

There has been no zombiefication this month. I'm sad. But I soon will be my zombie self, according to the MZS organisers. Oo, zombies. And pretty soon we'll all know who's out and who's in and we'll be slurping vit C tablets through straws until we cry for mercy and beat ourselves over the heads with USB flash drives. Savvy?

Funny how my peak productivity always hits its peak at about 2am. I wrote most of this blog in ten minutes flat last night and now that it's not longer last night and it's this afternoon I'm lost for words. I better get them down PDQ because we're very busy in the world of CJ Curry. Also, I totally nearly wrote "busty" instead of "busy". Wouldn't that be a helluva sight, though? Busty CJ Curry. I blame it on the proximity of the T and Y keys. There's always a problem whenever I write something and it turns out two keys next to each other transform the whole word OH SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Also, cook for me. And halfadozen others. And you will be awesome. Because we are buying your ingredients and you are cooking. There has already been one winner. Cook whatever you want, except don't cook me. Also also if you're reading this blog then this sentence is a non-sequitur.

Bottle of water. Bottle of water. Bottle of water. COOL.

Speaking of cool, it's time to take my car out for a wash, spin and rinse. Wagner's rinse cycle should suffice. Suffer ice? Maybe...

join the experience again soon...

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