THE CJ CURRY EXPERIENCE 52: SO OVER RATED
Ace of clubs.
Jack of hearts.
Jack of diamonds.
Six of diamonds.
Queen of diamonds.
See? SEE?! THIS is why I don't play poker!!!
...ahem. Excuse me for a moment.
--what are you two doing to my legs?
--ay, we're just cleaning them.
-- cleaning my legs? with marshmallows? are you insane?
--no. we're crazy.
--ah. that's different. carry on... but don't use the pink marshmallows. can't stand the taste.
--you lick your legs? are you crazy?
--no. i'm insane.
--a'ight. marshmallow time.
And so, to business. Carl Williams is dead. But rock and roll has been dead longer. And Ludwig van Beethoven should never have died. FUCKING. GENIUS.
And I can't beat my best friend's video game record, even though it's my game. FUCK. I will take tomorrow off and work hard on it all day until I beat him.
But in ze meantime, I need to talk about my addiction to ice. No, not crystal meth. I am addicted to ice, the frozen water type thing. It's even worse that I have a Space Invaders ice cube tray. NOW WE PROBLEMS. NOW WE DEFINITELY PROBLEMS. Ice is my weakness and I must conquer it. Joy.conquer.all -- if you know of any Ice Anonymous support groups near me, tell me in the usual way: send a scathing email to me and then go jump in a pool of jelly. Jello. Whatever.
I need an excuse. Not for anything, I just need an excuse. I might need to use it in the future. GIMME.
Also: The Game. Sucks to be you.
Confucius say: "Stop quoting me, motherfuckers."
THERE IS NOT A FACEPALM BIG ENOUGH FOR SHELDON FROM THE BIG BANG THEORY. I MUST ENDEAVOUR TO MAKE ONE.
And finally, I leave you with these randomly-generated numbers of wisdom:
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wait, what? I swear OO.o has problems. Still.